If you didn’t own a TV, it was a GREAT year for TV. Really. In our modern age where we are slowly becoming more and more like the Jetsons, all you need is your friend’s HBO GO password, and a functional computer, and you’d be privy to some of the best pieces of episodic storytelling an Amazon Prime Subscription can buy.

Between our two lists, there’s not a network show in sight, with just some a few Comedy Central entries making the cut. Even shows that continue to be amazing like Bob’s Burgersand Brooklyn Nine-Nine didn’t make the cut. We talked about them last year, so it’s fine. They know they’re great.

So without further ado, here are our Best TV Shows of 2014!

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Well… okay. This is a good start. We could have used this kind of thing about five or six episodes ago, but, as I learned many moons ago, AHS viewers can’t be choosers.

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Duchess of Cambridge slash Queen of Shade.

Kate Middleton’s side-eye has given us life again, and ICYMI is back again! Don’t get TOO excited. I am very inconsistent.

-Nicki Minaj released a new track featuring Beyonce, but as far as I’m concerned, Nicki Minaj doesn’t matter, which means BEYONCE RELEASED A NEW TRACK THIS WEEK. Rejoice.

-Vulture has exclusively learned that George Clooney is teaming up with Bennett Miller (of Capote and Foxcatcher) to create a comedic drama about the 1990s television industry. That sounds like a stupid amount of prestige involved, but I’m in.

-Best Buy tweeted a joke about Serial that I thought was kind of funny but the rest of the universe is up in arms about, so, whatever.

-Speaking of jokes, Aaron Sorkin has declared that this past week’s mansplaining mess was the best episode so far of The Newsroom, because he needed to mansplain to the world that what he wrote wasn’t an insulting turd.

-Let’s move on to lovely things. Do you want to feel pure joy? Watch Steve Carell sing “Sexual Healing” with a barbershop quartet on The Tonight Show.

-Also, here is an extraordinarily fun trailer for Pixar’s Inside Out, which needs to be released a lot sooner.

–Amy Schumer will host the 2015 MTV Movie Awards, which means I will for sure watch the 2015 MTV Movie Awards.

-Stephen Colbert is pulling out all the stops for his last two weeks of shows, and last night, he straight up interviewed Smaug. The world will be way less bright without the Report.

-Shonda Rhimes, the undisputed Queen of Primetime, gave an amazing speech about smashing glass ceilings, which she is also the queen of. Also my heart.

-Here is every single thing leaked from the Sony hack, if you really need to read Scott Rudin’s insulting emails about the President.

–Nick Offerman did an AMA, and you will be unsurprised to learn that it was FUCKING DELIGHTFUL.

We’ll be back in black this week with some ACTUAL POSTS, including all our feels about the Golden Globes! Get pumped!

Honestly, I was really only half paying attention for this episode, so this recap should just be an absolute blast. Sorry. I’m tired.

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