American Horror Story Season Finale Recap: All Washed Up

Well. This season of American Horror Story is over, the freak show is closed for business, and I AM FUCKING THRILLED. I’ve waited for this day for so long, so let’s not waste any time, but I’m sure you can imagine that I basically hated everything that happened in that episode. Well, you would be wrong about that one…

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American Horror Story Recap: A Doll’s House

This show is so frustrating that I want to put IT in a box and saw it in half. I was trying to remember how this season got started while I was watching last night’s penultimate episode, and I literally could not remember. I think there was a clown? Whatever. I can’t make myself care about any of this anymore. Ryan Murphy has driven me from anger to complete apathy, but I’ll write about this anyway, because goddammit, I finish what I start. (Also, I can make fun of it.)

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American Horror Story Recap: No Ifs, Ands, or Butts

(Sorry for the late recap!)

I mean… okay. This episode showed some real promise, which is simultaneously great and extremely irritating, because NOW IS JUST NOT THE TIME, MURPHY. You’ve got two episodes left, you just introduced a character with anĀ entirely new storyline, and the preview for next week had Danny Huston in it. Get your shit together, man.

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American Horror Story Recap: Mommie Dearest

I really enjoyed my week off from this show, and, to be completely honest, I was really dreading watching today’s episode and writing the recap. That being said… I was pleasantly surprised. Was this week’s episode perfect? No. Was it even particularly great? No, not really. But was it a huge improvement? Definitely.

(You may have noticed that my bar is set extremely low. As in, it’s sitting on the floor and you can just step right over it.)

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American Horror Story Recap: Papa, Don’t Preach

I am officially ready to announce that this season of AHS is straight up terrible. There’s no cohesive storytelling. For a show that usually goes to a lot of trouble to set up rules, there are zero rules about anything at all. Not a single character has a discernable motivation. And yet, here I am, writing this. At least I have a bagel to keep me company.

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American Horror Story: Paint Me Like One of Your French Girls

I feel like I’ve really lost track of this season of AHS, but I also understand that this series is a pretty consistent shit-show and that maybe it’ll have a better ending than Coven, which is really all I can ask for. Still, this episode felt really muddled throughout – it never seemed to totally focus, and though it had a great shock-value scene right at the end, I guess I wasn’t invested enough for it to really land. As a result, I feel like I don’t have THAT much to write about, but there was like, a ton of weird peen stuff happening in this episode, so at least we’ve got that.

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